TOUR!

Hell yes!

The Birds hit the road with Not Cool in May and June!

Can't wait!

MAY 27TH - NIGHT & DAY MANCHESTER
MAY 28TH - LEEDS JOSEPH WELLS w/NOT COOL
MAY 29TH - MIDDLESBOROUGH DOC BROWNS
JUNE 4TH - BRISTOL START THE BUS w/NOT COOL
JUNE 5TH - NEWCASTLE THE END w/NOT COOL
JUNE 12th - GHOST SCHOOL LONDON w/NOT COOL
JUNE 18TH - DONT DIE JUST YET WREXHAM w/NOT COOL
JUNE 20TH - NORWICH ARTS CENTRE w/NOT COOL
JUNE 25TH - ARTROCKER BRIGHTON



I'm expecting lots of beer, motorways and fights over who gets the window seat...

D-Bird

Nan Goldin

I first saw Nan Goldin's photography when I was in my teens. I can't remember what the book was called but I remember we weren't allowed to take it out of the library and that it was too big for me to sneak into my bag...

The photos jumped off the page and into my consciousness- I was utterly mesmerised by them. Snap shots of glamorous drag queens, young people in the prime of their life having fun, screwing around, partying and taking drugs. A world completely removed from the suburban, respectable Asian upbringing I was used to. These people seemed like movie stars to me- a world away and exciting. The deeper I delved into the book and the more and more I looked at the photographs I realised that underneath the veneer of the make-up, the glamour, the party, Nan Goldin managed to capture the vulnerability of her subjects. It was this vulnerability that I found most interesting- these people weren’t sleek, air brushed models or actors preened to look or pose a certain way. Nan’s subjects were people encompassing every feeling and emotion which made up a real person- they could me, they could be you. At the click of Nan’s camera her subjects were themselves, no one else. Posed or otherwise, what she captured was real.

She took photographs of herself after she had just been physically abused by her boyfriend. In one particular photo an ugly, purple and red swelling dominated her bloodshot eye- it was a shocking photograph but something I couldn't take my eyes off. I always thought you took photos of happy occasions but I as I held the photograph to my face her swollen eye in line with mine the photo stuck in my mind- she wanted to be reminded of what he did to her. The photos of her battered and bruised were juxtaposed with photos of people having sex- it was a real mind fuck which kicked the innocence right out of me. By the 90's most of her friends who had featured in her work had passed away through either AIDs related illnesses or drug overdoses. This she also captured in her documentary style. She was close friends with Cookie Mueller the writer and actress who featured in John Water's early films with Divine. Nan Goldin documented Mueller's husband's funeral after he had passed away from AIDs and a few months later documented Mueller's own funeral when she passed away from the same illness. I was struck by the love she obviously had for her friends in the way in which she photographed their happier times up until their moment of passing. The book was like a story with a beginning, middle and end. You went on a journey with Goldin and her photo subjects, soaking in every photo memory she shared with you.


Here is a short documentary of Goldin talking about her work.

PART 1



PART 2


X-Bird

And so it is.

As D-Bird mentioned in her previous post- us Birds have had our fair share of major disasters. You name it and we've probably 'been there, done that...' We've only been doing this for just over a year but there have been times when I've just thought- to hell with it. Making relationships work is the hardest thing in the world. When tempers rise people ultimately explode. A giant fire ball of grievances then hurtles out of the wreckage like gun fire. It is the most excruciating pain but you get through it, you have to learn from it. A spontaneous combustion isn’t really spontaneous at all because you’re usually aware of the explosion coming- you’re just a fool if you refuse to acknowledge that it is on its way. In order for this to work you have to be so much more aware of the bigger picture. There is no room or time for selfishness, super egos must be extinguished. You’re working everyday with people who know you better than anyone else- they know how to get your back up but they know how to calm you down. They can be the hardest people to work with but also be the most INSPIRING. Nothing is ever easy but ultimately you keep going because of the sheer passion for what you do. We do this because nothing makes us happier than playing live and writing songs. We wouldn’t have gigged solidly for over a year if we thought otherwise. As D-Bird says the arm of good gortune has outstretched towards us on a couple of occasions and allowed us to bounce back from hard knocks. It is these hard knocks that make us work harder and more importantly, together.

I have been told by friends that I work through things as though I live in an ideal world. When the shit grinds you down, if you don't think about you want from the ideal world then you may as well be 6-feet under. I'm not an eternal optimist but yes at times what I want and expect from the human race is not realistic. Ultimately I live in the hope that people will eventually learn from the errors of their ways (myself included!) and that we will all live reasonably happily ever after.

I have to admit living hand to mouth wasn't really part of my 5 year plan. And it is hard staying focused and creative when you can feel the debt collector's breath on your neck. But I refuse to be consumed by a poor me, poor me attitude and I actually consider myself extremely lucky. A feeling I'm sure which is shared by the rest of The Birds. It is this constant struggle to keep everything going that is reminding me that I'm alive. I get to do something I feel a feverish passion for and you know what that makes me the luckiest person in the world.

X-Bird

THIS WEEK I HAVE LEARNT

TIME TO REFLECT

1. That I am useless at coming up with fake names. Might as well have called myself Hugh Jarse.
2. Getting this band around the country/world is not as difficult and possibly far easier than I initially imagined. Thanks to X-Bird, we are going to be able to navigate ourselves around France next week. Phew! That was close.
3. I have forgotten to knit for 5 months.
4. Everytime a major disaster seems to happen for this band, we bounce back exceedingly quickly and feel the outstretched arm of Good Fortune.
5. I don't do anything cultural anymore - theatre, galleries, exhibitions. I blame this on severe lack of funds rather than a severe lack of interest.
6. I haven't eaten any parsnips this entire week.
7. I don't have many friends. I've become comfortable with the few people I hang out with and the thought of going out without them and with new people terrifies me.
8. I am desperate to hear NEW great music.
9. I miss doing my club nights and it's going to be pretty hard fitting everything in but I'm looking forward to the next one immensely.
10. We will miss playing the regular London shows that we've done for the last year but we are really looking forward to playing round the country and abroad. It feels like we're starting all over again as a band and it's extremely exciting.

All Apologies Kurt

I know I take your name in vain in almost every blog post/interview I do...I am completely freaked out by the number of Nirvana t shirts people are wearing at the moment and I'm terrified that known 'celebrities' who have admitted they don't like Nirvana are now wearing them as some sort of fashion statement.

D-Bird

The Problem With Music

There is no guide to being a 'rock star', as even the late great Kurt Cobain complained. 'The Problem With Music' was an article written by Mr Steve Albini back in the early 1990s. I think it is a good article but I can never really finish reading through the figures as its stark truth makes a pretty disheartening read: http://www.negativland.com/albini.html

Plus we have to remember this was written before the time of digital music and downloads. If we bring the internet into the equation, then bands make even more of a loss now!!

The three of us have currently given up everything to do this band. I'm not saying that for a slice of your pity, or awe or for any damn thing. I am not seeking anything from you. There are lots of other bands who also do this, it's the damn norm if you are a dedicated musician. We've given up our day jobs, can't even fit part-time jobs around our hectic schedule, have learnt to accept a major change in our lifestyles through the serious lack of not having any money and are learning to deal with this constant, daily, heavy stress.

To be honest, apart from the last 13 months, I've never really had to deal with money being an issue in my life. Having to adjust to not even choosing to limit my spending but being forced to limit my spending because of lack of funds, has been a very raw and humble experience for me and I expect this will continue for the rest of my life.

You have a lot of crap days doing this. Despite giving up everything to finally do what you love, there are days when you cannot get out of bed and hide alone in your room till you are forced to come out for a gig or photoshoot. There are days when people who are meant to be working for you fuck things up so much and leave you feeling numb, raw and angry for giving them so much of your pure trust. There are days when every relationship in your life suffers because you are a fragile creative trying to meet like-minded fragile creatives who still don't seem to understand you or you fall for non-creatives who don't understand the very core of your being. There are days when you hate yourself and everyone around you and you scream at yourself, 'why the hell am I working 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for absolutely NOTHING???!!'

So why the hell do you do it?

I'll tell you why.

1. Since the moment you picked up a pair of drum sticks 15 years ago, you have never ever stopped tapping.

2. The only thing that helped you survive the darkest, deepest years of your life was music. Nothing and no one else could or ever will help in the same way.

3. There is no greater buzz than jamming or playing onstage.

4. You are your complete and utter own boss. My god that feels sooooo good!

5. You get panic attacks on all public transport, find sitting in an open office plan staring at the dull faces of your equally suicidal colleagues a form of modern torture and believe all firms/offices are society's accepted equivalent of Abhu Ghraib.

Once you understand that being in a band is a purely creative outlet and that you cannot force your music on people who just don't want to hear it and no matter how much you go around telling people you are changing the world....YOU ARE NOT, then you can quietly go about your ways making a very loud racket. I respect those who have tasted a slice of humble pie and have stuck to their morals, ethos and principles no matter what. Music is not a competition, a clique, a race or a means by which to make others doing the same job feel less inferior than you because you have garnered more column inches than them. NO WAY.

Music is about personal expression, hearing the souls of other people, supporting new, refreshing sounds and helping to get them out there rather than choosing support acts who are the newest buzz bands or top friends that will make you look cooler and stronger as a clique.

All this, my friends, are the problems that I personally have with music. Yes, there is no guide to being a 'rock' star but there is always a guide to being a 'punk'.

What is it?

If you are one then you will already know it.

D-Bird

2009 The Year That Punk Broke?

Gosh, if you haven't seen this documentary already then please, please, please check it out.

What I would've done to have been old enough and aware enough to go see this tour back in 1991.



I love the scene of Dave Grohl in the backstage area feeling up the grapes and kiwis!!

I really think it's time to harp back to the days where great bands tour together because they have a similar ethos, attitude and love each others music. Although we just did a few nights of the Selfish Cunt tour back in December, there was a real sense of kinship between us. Hell, maybe all bands are currently touring with each other to experience that but I want to experience this again for myself.

Who knows what the future holds? This current lifestyle leads to dramatic shifts in fame and fortune in the space of a few days let alone trying to plan and manage expectations beyond that.

All in all, it's exciting times...
D-Bird